One of my ex-girlfriends...

I am Inga from Sveeeeden…

30,000-Kronor equals about $3,700—That’s what one Swedish gentleman recently ponied-up to get a little work done on his Swedish dong.  The man’s original plan was to add some girth to ‘the little viking’—but at the last second he changed his mind and explained to the surgeon that he wanted to make his wiener longer instead (the dude clearly hates his wiener)…When the dust settled, his genitalia was neither longer, wider, bilingual or in any way more appealing to women…The surgeon who worked on the penis has since refused to perform any sort of corrective surgery, consequently the victim is filing a report to Sweden’s Medical Responsibility Board…

I’m half Irish—so according to stereotype, I have a small thingy…It gets tricky in my case though because I’m also part Polish—which means I don’t even know how to properly use a ruler…Who the Hell knows…?

…the weenie-widening procedure is obviously a frightening ordeal.  Sheets of cadaver-skin are more or less ‘wrapped around the clown’ until the desired effect is created—So regardless of my personal situation, there is no way I’d let anyone roll up a dead person’s skin around Mr. Swiss-Roll just so I can start pushing the envelope in bed…

For the second time in as many weeks, I’m glad I’m not having surgery in Sweden…